SANTA CLAUS

Time to decorate for Christmas . . . "are we going to put up a tree this year, or the manger scene I ask my husband? It’s such a hassle, bringing it up from the crawl space. Why don’t we get a little table top one," I say. He nods okay with a glum look which means he wants the big tree. “It’s tradition,” he says. “Well, maybe not the manger scene?” I ask. Let’s go modern, I’m thinking. Another glum look.

Fifty-two years ago when my first child was born I ordered a beautiful manger scene from Italy. Almost every year since then I’ve set it up. After placing the small figures in a snow backdrop of white cloth with lights shining around and through the cloth, the angel hanging on the wall, I feel a special contentment as I stand and meditate on the symbolic meaning of the story of Christ being born. As a mother, Montessori enthusiast, and guide, the story has great truth and important teaching elements for me.

Santa Claus is another Christmas story originating when an old guy with a white beard put gifts in children’s shoes. Unlike the infant Jesus, a promised savior who brought hope to the people of a nation, this old man brought hope to the children of poor families. Both stories are tales of giving which give us opportunity to express our traditions, or models to create new ones.

Parents ask, “How do we tell our children about Santa Claus and be honest?” Maria Montessori would remind you to not tell or try to teach—but to show. Create the environment which has meaning to your family or community and your child will absorb the truths you want to share.

“Innocents Lost” the headline reads today, December 14, 2012—a very sad day for all and for our nation. We will need our stories to renew hope for our broken hearts, and to create a new and safer environment for our young.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

REMINDERS

“We have to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative . . . . “ Remember that song?

Maren Schmidt had a good quote in her recent newsletter, Understanding Montessori. “If you find yourself in a "crabby habit of mind", shift your focus to the blessing instead of the criticism. Look for the positive, knowing full well the negative is there. Find qualities to appreciate and praise. What you feed grows, so feed positive qualities with appreciation and ignore negative qualities as long as no one is hurt. As you find qualities to be thankful for in your children and others, you will cultivate an attitude of gratitude.”

She quotes Dr. John Gottman who lists in his book, The Relationship Cure, about 75 qualities we can find to appreciate and praise. Some of these follow: loving, intelligent, strong, energetic, persistent, funny, gentle, kind, relaxed, beautiful, calm, tender, careful, strong, interesting and helpful.

As a scientist, Dr. Montessori observed these qualities in the children and focused on the reasons to value them, knowing they are attributes of the normal child.  The work of the parent, teacher, or guide is to focus on, appreciate, and praise the expected positive qualities.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

HOLIDAYS

Tis the season children get excited as they set their hearts on gifts seen on television and in stores. Moms and Dads may feel the stress of their child’s excitement for different reasons—like shortage of money which is a problem this year with so many out of work. Christmas, like every day, is a time for happiness but sometimes it doesn’t have a chance when parents and children are forgetting how to relax and enjoy moments and treasures of everyday pleasures of life.

  

I was intent on finishing my Christmas letters and shopping this week, before the first of December. My mind, busy with mental lists, kept waking me in the night, leaving me tired during the day and too exhausted and short of energy I needed to accomplish my intent. Doesn’t make sense, does it?

 What if I were a parent, or a teacher having to be with children the next day and my child or one of the children in the classroom was frustrated with the family stress of the holidays?

  

It’s not easy for a parent or teacher to let go of their own emotional situation and consider the child’s point of view and emotional feelings of the moment.

Dr. Montessori always paid attention to the troubled child, first. She knew the upset child had the greatest need for appreciation and praise.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

TECHNOLOGY

Recently a question was presented in a group discussion of Montessori teachers that totally stumped me and made me realize how completely out-of-date I am to a new culture our children are absorbing and growing in to: Smart boards, iPads, iPhones, and new technological gadgets and games to come. The teacher wanted to know when and how all this technology is incorporated into the child’s life.

I’ve been thinking about this all week, wondering what Maria Montessori would tell or show the teachers. As a scientist, she would understand the mechanics of it all—certainly more so than I ever will. I’ve been told there is software (aps) for Montessori teachers to learn how to present the technical applications and collaborate with the children’s materials. She recommended waiting until the child was five.

Another person commenting suggested to wait until the child had the reasoning to make comparisons and did so through sensorial material. My suggestion is to work with comparisons with nature and a child’s senses.

It upsets me to see very young children spending their time pushing buttons on these little game pads that offer limited learning experiences. What is their life missing in the meantime? Better they spend the time asking live people questions about their world. Let them use their imagination and wonder about the magic of the technology of our age. Let them enjoy and learn to appreciate the social joy of verbal and handwriting communication. It’s the journey that matters.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

GOOD SENSE

Once again, I want to share Marnie’s excellent website, http://carrotsareorange.com/montessori-sensorial/, to remind parents and educators how important an awareness of sensorial activities is for the developing brain. Maria Montessori’s observations and experiences in the 1900’s showed that a child’s intellect is developed through his senses—a philosophy based in science and since confirmed in modern day studies.

Montessori schools offer a variety of sensorial materials and methods to encourage the child’s development.  Websites like marnie@carrotssareorange.com, www.kidstalknews.com , debchitwood@livingmontessorinow.com, and many more, are created to help parents with at-home children. Homeschooling is becoming popular with parents studying Montessori methods and making their own materials. Maria Montessori would be happy with whatever works for the families and the child.

Marnie quotes from Pat Wolfe’s book, How the Brain Learns, “The only way to get information into the brain is through our senses,” and from Bronowski: “You could not get a human being to build anything unless the child had put together a set of blocks.

I’m reminded of the thousands of Legos, Tinker toys, Lincoln logs, and electro pieces that my five sons enjoyed creating imaginative structures. Today they are entrepreneurs and doctors.

Another recent, very creative post of Marnie’s is, http://carrotsareorange.com/sensory-activity-toddlers-preschoolers,

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

COLLABORATING

…, a favorite Montessori word and not always an easy accomplishment. I certainly haven’t perfected it. I watch parents shopping with their children to observe how others do it. Little ones sit in the basket or walk along the side wanting to push the basket, maybe grabbing merchandise off the counters. “Mommy, can I have this?” One mother may just say no while another, understanding that the child wants to do what she is doing, will give the child an option to choose something meaningful.

The key to collaborating is to understand another’s point of view. An older child, of reasoning intelligence, can be told no and with some understanding of their parent’s point of view, will collaborate and accept the no or begin a discussion. The young child, not capable of collaborating, will normally cry. They need the adult to do the collaborating. Collaborating can satisfy even infants and babies when the adult soothes the child with rocking, singing, petting, music, feeding, or change of scene, and of clothing.

The key to understanding, Maria Montessori tells us, is observation, the first essential principle of collaborating with the child’s development of his human intelligence. It takes a lot of heart, patience, and love to sacrifice one’s time for the love of another; but this is the calling of parents. Consistency in awareness of the young child’s point of view will lead parents to the habit of collaboration. This habit will carry over to the frustrating teen years when the young adults struggle to have their own mind. Ideally they will come to their parents for discernment.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com

ALL SAINTS AND ALL SOULS

 . . . days to remind us of our ancestors—Days of the Dead, some call them. I like to think of these days as reminders of our passing loved ones whose spirit lives on in our choices of behaviors and attitudes, which we, in turn, will pass on to our next generation to create eternal life on earth.

Is this not what eternity is all about? I think, if Maria Montessori were alive today and involved in our latest studies of our DNA, she would confirm the passing on of eternal life to a new generation of humanity, as our ancestors, living in us and with us share our life. Our ancestors’ life in us and with us, from the beginning of our conception, a psychic energy in fetus and embryo, is the beginning of our absorbent mind which in turn brought to life a new world for our parents to enjoy.

Growing up with my children gave me unmatched joy. Today I pray for parents and educators all over the world to appreciate the lives, past and present, God gives us.

Please read my book, Montessori—Living the Good Life. www.montessoritheory.com